Out Of Love For My Son’s Star Wars Toys, I Stole Them
Four things I’ve dreamed of all my life. I dream of them constantly, while mowing the lawn, while half-listening in conversations, while sleeping, while not sleeping. These are the four:
- Finding a corpse.
- Finding something precious that someone has lost, and returning it to them (this could be corpse, but also a diamond ring, or an infant).
- Finding myself in a situation where I must save the day by subduing an evil person with my fists and kicks.
- Finding a stash of original Star Wars Toys.
In all four categories, I’ve come close.
Corpse
On an ocean island, I discovered a wet suit mostly buried in sand, and with my hands, I dug down and down. There was no head, but this didn’t mean the rest of him or her wasn’t there. I dug into the tunnels of the wet suit’s arms and torso and legs, expecting all the time to feel bones. I found only sand. I was as disappointed as those guys in that Ark of the Covenant documentary who found only sand and ghosts and melting.
Returning Something Precious
The closest I’ve come to this is losing my wedding ring and giving someone else the opportunity to have my dream come true for them. Whoever found it has not yet fulfilled the other half of the…
